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sparring with an audience
[If you're passing by the detective agency's office today, you might get to see a fight. Fauna, a familiar sight to most around Starsand, and Atsushi - no, the other one. The other other one.
Atsushi's grinning as they battle, so there's probably no bad blood involved… then again, with these two, it's hard to tell, especially with Fauna's mask covering any expression she might make.
Atsushi is a straightforward fighter, and his strikes with his sword are powerful. He doesn't dodge much, but he takes Fauna's fire and ice attacks head-on and keeps going strong. His attacks are almost reckless, the aggressive style of someone who knows he can tank any hit his opponent deals him and can fix any injuries later, trading openings in his own form for damage dealt to his opponent.
Fauna's fighting style, in contrast to her normal, headstrong nature, is quite methodical- First, blasts of fire and ice, scarring the battlefield to restrict her opponent's movements. Then a form change to her owl form, a bombardment of high-speed knives as she flies around to create openings. Then, when she's finally restricted and worn her opponent down, she strikes- Her lion form comes in swinging, intending to end it in a single, electric blow.
The battle ends in a draw, with Atsushi's sword at Fauna's neck and Fauna's sword at his heart. There's plenty of time afterwards to catch either of the two in conversation, if you've stuck around to watch.]
Atsushi's grinning as they battle, so there's probably no bad blood involved… then again, with these two, it's hard to tell, especially with Fauna's mask covering any expression she might make.
Atsushi is a straightforward fighter, and his strikes with his sword are powerful. He doesn't dodge much, but he takes Fauna's fire and ice attacks head-on and keeps going strong. His attacks are almost reckless, the aggressive style of someone who knows he can tank any hit his opponent deals him and can fix any injuries later, trading openings in his own form for damage dealt to his opponent.
Fauna's fighting style, in contrast to her normal, headstrong nature, is quite methodical- First, blasts of fire and ice, scarring the battlefield to restrict her opponent's movements. Then a form change to her owl form, a bombardment of high-speed knives as she flies around to create openings. Then, when she's finally restricted and worn her opponent down, she strikes- Her lion form comes in swinging, intending to end it in a single, electric blow.
The battle ends in a draw, with Atsushi's sword at Fauna's neck and Fauna's sword at his heart. There's plenty of time afterwards to catch either of the two in conversation, if you've stuck around to watch.]
no subject
Her armor can't cry. It doesn't have the ability- It's all armor, it doesn't have tear ducts, it can't.
And yet tears well up regardless as she listens, before finally letting out a weak wail, hunching over to cry as Dazai talks to her. All her agony, all her emotions, coming out at once, in one wordless scream.]
no subject
There there.
I've got you.
no subject
All she can do is let the tears come out, and ride out the wave of emotions.]
cw: child abuse reference
Yes, he had been a monster.
But now, he was comforting a young lady. Someone who seemed to trust him. She had the same temperament, the same desire to prove herself, the same drive to repent for mistakes she made and some that she never made at all. It's something that strikes him to his core.
His voice is calming. He's mimicking what Odasaku would've done - that's the best he can always do. What that man he adored above else would do, what he would say, what he was capable of in Dazai's eyes...
Yet he never knew if that was exactly what he'd do. Or what he'd want. Or...anything. But for now, he gently rests his arm around Fauna.]
Shh, shh. We're okay.
[We're. Not you're, we're. He's reassuring himself, too.
A man who deals in quantities of nothingness trying to be something for somebody. The comfort of a monster, the words of someone who was...no longer human.
But neither of them were alone. That mattered the most.]
cw: child abuse reference
Finally, after a few minutes, she manages to calm down- Face still wet, still sniffling and hiccuping, but she manages to at least start talking again.]
... Will you... Will you listen? For a bit?
no subject
Of course.
You've got my full attention.
cw: child abuse, cheating, alcoholism, transphobia
I don't know what to do... You say that the ADA is like a family, but the only family I know hated me. My mother was always out cheating with another man, and my old man just drank himself stupid and took it all out on me. It was my fault the family was like that... 'cause I was the freak who thought he was a girl.
cw: child abuse, sexual abuse reference
That's not a family. That's repulsive. And it was never your fault. Ever. Don't ever think that.
You're a perfectly beautiful young lady, Fauna. And always have been.
[He'd kill either of those two without thinking twice, were he to see them. He's quiet.]
In all honesty, I've never known a proper family, either. When I was younger - far, far younger than now - I had a father. A mother. I used to believe there were ghosts in our house, and eating was a ritual to put them at ease. I feared my father more than the world itself. I resorted to being a clown in order to conceal my fears and anxieties, stemming from being well-off, fearing having respect and expectation, and having...dashing good looks, to the point where our servants took notice.
[He leaves the last part at that. Nothing else needs to be said.]
That made me run away from home. And then the Port Mafia was the only family I'd gotten to know, which in itself was a sad excuse for anything resembling a 'family'. They at least sheltered me, and I harmed others more than I got harmed. Which was an improvement at the time.
I didn't know ACTUAL family until I joined ADA. And then it hit me all at once. Just because people are blood-related to you doesn't make them family. Blood runs in the veins of every human being, and in some beings that aren't human. It's meaningless to divide based on that alone, and those who mistreat you hardly deserve such titles. Thus, you pick, and you choose the people who will ACTUALLY love and support you and be there for you when you're hurting as family. If you so choose.
That's my perspective on it, at least.
cw: starvation and homelessness
... But if she's confessing everything... No, she needs to confess everything. If Dazai will have her in this family, then they need to know who she is. What she's done.
Everything.
She rubs at her eyes.]
I... hope you're right. I want to believe you're right. But I still get scared.
... After a while, I couldn't take it anymore. They were both hypocrites, and nothing worked the way anyone said it would work. Family was supposed to love you, but mine was like that... If you were honest, people would be your friend, but that never worked. If you tried hard, you'd get results, but that wasn't true, either...
So when I turned fourteen, I couldn't take anymore. So I ran away. Out into the streets.
... No one would help me there, either. I survived for a while by eating what other people threw away. I didn't want to steal from anyone, after all. But I couldn't keep that up... and I thought I was going to die there. On the streets, alone, starving.
[She sniffs again, trying to keep herself from crying more...]
That's when the Goddess found me.
no subject
He knew the life of a runaway quite well, too. He'd been one himself, after all, but people were able to take pity on him, even if he hadn't perfected the image of a clown yet at that time. He was a young man. A young man with promise. That was what drew in the Port Mafia, after all.
Though he did resort to stealing. Human beings were corrupt enough, he'd told himself, that taking things from them meant nothing. Nothing but survival. It was like nature taking its due. A taxation on humanity for bringing forth such a being to this world. So she still remained far more morally upright than him.]
The Goddess.
[He repeats, quietly, showing that he's listening.]
And she assisted you.
no subject
Fauna nods, quietly.]
... The Goddess of Salvation. She could... sense my despair. And offered me power. The power to grant my wish.
I wanted a better world. A just world. But she said... that it wasn't possible to fix the world we had. We just had to break it. Destroy what was there- and put her in charge. If she was in charge, she'd be able to make a perfect world.
[She reaches into her pouch, and pulls out her changer, though its screen is dark due to Dazai's power.]
I believed her.
cw: child abuse
[In another world, Fauna would've been in grave danger. There were people - people like Fyodor - who would've preyed upon something like that, but done it with absolute devotion. That was his sales pitch to a T, preying upon the weak, promising them a better world in exchange for devotion, especially when it came to children. His 'rats', as he called them. Except he had no real power to give. Only falsehoods and fear.]
I don't blame you.
Things like that are quite easy to believe if you're young and have very little options.
no subject
... My job was to go around. Find other people who were in despair, outside of where the Goddess could reach. Grant them the same choice she granted me. Power to grant their wishes.
[She lowers her head, forehead to her knees as her voice comes out muffled.]
All of them became monsters instead. Obsessed with using their new power for their wishes. Monsters called Wishes.
They would attack people, destroy buildings, whatever they wanted. And I was to stop anyone who tried to stop them. I knew it was wrong, but... I was scared that if I left, or disobeyed, I'd be back on the streets again, and this time, there would be monsters sent after me. So I learned to steal, to lie to people... Whatever it took to survive. It didn't matter who I hurt or stole from, because I was already trying to destroy the world as it was anyway...